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WELCOME TO NEVER MIND THE B(OL)LOGS

Stamp Addressed Envelopes from The Edge. But not Bono.

Welcome to Never Mind The B(Ol)logs, a unique (not really) blog featuring the ramblings of an idiot who really should be trying to do something meaningful with his life. Please read then destroy your computer to be on the safe side.

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Small Smirk Audio

Once more some old stuff from the vaults. There are rumours of semi original landing soon, possibly tomorrow. What a time to be alive. In...

The Men (and Women) in Blue

Chapter one - Fixing a Hellmouth Bailey lent back on her chair chewing on the end of her pen. “How do you spell Sasquatch?” she asked...

An Error of Comedies?!

More thoughts from the past. They say never go back, but have you tried visiting the future for new material? It’s a logistical...

A Silk Bum-bag out of sow’s ears

Summerbot booted up from its sleep mode, no perchance to dream for this automaton. Its creator who was a master of the science had...

Anne-Marie the time travelling spider

Anne-Marie the time travelling spider The greatest novice tempus slider Stepped into her amazing machine opening the temporal gate Eight...

Random book chapter be here

Chapter iiiviixiixiillmmm© - There is a chip shop in England that absolutely does not sell chips and no one in there thinks they’re Elvis...

Clear the Punway

This blog has no structure. And at this point my legal team are advising me I should make clear none of the previous blogs had any...

A Bad Time to Exhume Good News

A couple of weeks back, I woke up read the news, then went on my Social Media feed and that was moving from bad news to people talking...

I Charity Walked with a Zombie

Welcome to BBC news today on 8th June as we cover Albert Newton, a zombie of 15 years who has decided to improve the morale of Britain...

Pedro the Post Party Panda

Pedro the Post Party Panda, Was post party feeling alone and down So, he decided to take a wander To see if his friends could bring him...

Communication Fix Up

This week, month, whatever the fuck the lapse of time has been, is about communication. Be that on a macro or micro level. And when I’ve...

We Have Your Number (and are Listening)

My team of unaccountable experts Tell me which way the wind should blow I let those that cover the story tell me its narrative I’ll score...

Bridget The Super Carrot

Heroes come in all sizes and shapes And Bridget was the bravest of the lot Flying around in her shiny cape Bridget the super carrot Fast...

Shitness (of) the unfitness

This week is all about looking after mind, body and soul including top tips for doing this. If you’re finding Coronavirus impacting on...

Little Forest Johnson – Bum Crisis

“Woe is me, what can I do?” Said Little Forest Johnson “I don’t seem to be able to poo This really, really can’t go on!” Little Forest...

Interviewed by the Vampire

Ebi, no Olaf, today he was Olaf, woke groggily. His stomach lurched at the prospect of the job interview impending. He rose and washed...

Peasy Loafer

I’m going to attempt to get through this without mentioning the ‘C’ Word. No not cunt (I agonised over whether I should have censored...

Chapter and Terse

Not had time to write anything original this week (ever?!), and I'm not passing that word search off. So in a cheat and an attempt to say...

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